If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
Randomize
