How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
It is 3am. I'm at a pizzeria with my 4 friends. The one to my right is throwing up on herself, the one to my left is crying hysterically by herself, the one in front of me is passed out on the table, and the other is trying to find a taxi and I'm pretty sure a guy is sticking his hand up her skirt. Tourists are taking pictures. Help me.
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
Randomize
