i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
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