some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
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