your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
Do you know how when animals have surgery they put those cones around their heads so they can't lick their wounds so they can heal? I think someone should invent that for human emotions.
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize