Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
Randomize
