I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
Randomize
