South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
Randomize
