you guys were way drunker than both of me
I have demons in me.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
Randomize
