don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
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