the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
