I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
Success! We fucked roommates!
I just walked into my kitchen and my little brother is standing with his face two inches from the clock, staring at it, and eating an apple. I asked wtf he was doing and he just goes "the hour hand is moving VERY slowly".
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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