I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
