It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
Randomize