You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
Randomize
