she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
Randomize
