the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
