Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
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