She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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