There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
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