Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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