let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
I use my feet as sexual weapons
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
