she was so not down for the gang bang
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
Randomize
