do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
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