I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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