i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
Randomize
