are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
Randomize
