i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
I just elbowed a roll of wrapping paper, and said “ohh sorry”. I’m still drunk.
Randomize
