You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
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