The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
Randomize
