Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
I just gave her a sobriety test in the middle of the baking aisle.
And the results, officer?
She's fucked.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Randomize
