I'm really into asian looking animals
I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
