She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
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