I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
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