in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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