it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
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