Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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