Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
Randomize
