hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
