Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
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