that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
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