fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
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