is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
Randomize
