if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
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