even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
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