even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
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