So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
Randomize
