Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
no more duck duck goose at the bar
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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