fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
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