i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
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