Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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