was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
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