you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize
