So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
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